Episode 204: Overcoming Shame
Download MP3Hey everybody. Grab your Bible and a pencil and a journal and maybe even a cup of coffee and join in on our conversation. But first, I would like for you to write this down. Genesis 3 verses 7 through 10. Then the eyes of both of them were opened and they knew that they were naked.
DOT BOWEN:And they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loincloths. And they heard the sound of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day. And the man and his wife hid themselves on the presence of the Lord God among the trees of the garden. But the Lord God called to the man and said to him, where are you? And he said, I heard the sound of you in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked and I hid myself.
CARA BOWEN:Hey, everyone. Welcome to Write This Down with Dot Bowen. My name is Cara. I am Dot's daughter. And every week, we sit down together and we talk through truth and scripture, and we are continuing the conversation about Genesis 3.
CARA BOWEN:And we are really diving into the where are you question and how we hide from God, and what do we hide behind? And what does it mean to abide in Christ? What does it mean to seek God in our shame? And what does shame even mean? I mean, we really dive into a lot of really rich and good conversation in this episode.
CARA BOWEN:So we would love for you to pull up a chair and join in our conversation.
DOT BOWEN:Hey, Kara. Here we go.
CARA BOWEN:Genesis 3. Here we go.
DOT BOWEN:I know. And I just wanna say that not this is not a disclaimer. This is an explanation. Maybe that it sounds like, Kara, that we're repeating our conversations, but we're not repeating what we're saying. I mean, we will repeat some of the things.
DOT BOWEN:Go Well, yeah.
CARA BOWEN:We're repeating Genesis 3.
DOT BOWEN:Genesis 3 over and over again. But, we wanna dig deep. You know, we talked last week about how important these three questions are that God, you know, asked. And if God asked a question, I I think we should pay attention to them. And we wanna just kinda dig deeper into those things because these these three questions kinda really shed light to what's going on in our hearts, in our minds, our motivations.
CARA BOWEN:Yeah. He's not asking like, he knows the answer Right. To the questions he asked. But, yeah, they're more so for us to know.
DOT BOWEN:Right. And I think it just shows such great, grace and mercy and love that god has for us that, you know, here he knew that they had sinned. And he wants to bring them into a realization of them understanding that so that they will know what's really going on, you know, in their hearts and kinda, you know, kinda uses these questions to really, in an intimate way, draw them closer to him by them being honest and true. Now they're not, but he does give them an option to do that. He does give them
CARA BOWEN:a choice. They're not honest?
DOT BOWEN:No. They, if you at the very beginning when I was reading, then the eyes of both of them were open. And we talked about last week that, you know, they started to see things totally different. Well, in verse 10, he says, I heard the sound of you in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked and I hid myself. He he wasn't afraid because he was naked.
DOT BOWEN:Half truth isn't always still a lie. But he hit himself. He's because he heard God coming. And so that's why he, you know, that's why he got afraid. Wasn't because he was naked because he actually put clothes on him.
DOT BOWEN:He's he wasn't even naked. He was had fig leaves. The boy's not telling the truth, Tara. Okay. I
CARA BOWEN:feel like don't get married. That day. I was at the one in my garden.
DOT BOWEN:Well,
CARA BOWEN:I was just gonna say, like, I feel like that is a lot of I don't think he's Adam is intending to be dishonest is what I'm trying to say. I think he's just because of the shame, I think shame can keep us from being fully honest and vulnerable with the Lord. So that's what I was gonna say is I feel like like, yeah, that, like, that's true. But I think because of Adam's shame, he's not fully being honest because of the shame, which I think we all do too. Like, we don't wanna, you know, we, like, minimize or we're like, oh, yeah.
CARA BOWEN:I just want why are you looking at me like this?
DOT BOWEN:Because I'm sitting there thinking, you don't have to make excuses for Adam and Eve.
CARA BOWEN:Excuses. I'm saying that that's what we do. I'm saying that
DOT BOWEN:we do that
CARA BOWEN:because of shame. Because of shame.
DOT BOWEN:Because of Jesus' reign, but I'm constantly saying we sure do. Yes. And I wanna say I'm not making I know you're not making excuses. I'm just laughing because I'm sitting here thinking, this is exactly what Adam and Eve were doing. And the fact that, yes, you know, we talked about they, you know, their eyes were open.
DOT BOWEN:When their eyes were open, their eyes were always been open. But now they're seeing things differently. They're seeing things through the shame and the guilt, which is what you're talking about. Yes. That's just possible to say.
CARA BOWEN:I'm just pointing that out of, like, we'd be if we feel ashamed in what we've done, whether it's the Lord or someone else in our life, we will be like, well, I you know, like, God, this is like really what I'm thinking. But he's like, we can be completely honest with him. Like, he knows. Like, he is not looking at he's not looking at him being like being like, oh, that's the full story. That's great.
CARA BOWEN:And carries on with his day. Like, he's trying to get Adam Yeah. To like, like, tell me what's really tell me what really happened. Tell me what's really going on in your heart. Yeah.
CARA BOWEN:And I think if we don't acknowledge the fact that the shame is keeping us back, then the shame will continue
DOT BOWEN:to keep us back. Right. Yes. Thank you. And that's exactly amen, my god.
DOT BOWEN:I know what
CARA BOWEN:I'm saying is true. Yeah.
DOT BOWEN:I know what you're saying is
CARA BOWEN:true. Don't disregard it.
DOT BOWEN:I am not at all. And we even talked about it, you know, last week. Yes. The shame and the guilt and the sin distorted his view. And he began to make excuses because we see this, how he blames, and we'll talk about that how he blames, you know, actually ended up truth of it is that he's blaming God for what he did because he said it's the woman that you gave me.
DOT BOWEN:So the the opportunity for Adam was to be honest with God. That that was the whole point. That's what God wanted. Just be real. Don't tell me what you want me to say here.
DOT BOWEN:Don't tell me what you think I wanna hear. Like, we're not we're not gonna go anywhere in our relationship. I feel like God is and and I'm speaking from I mean, I've had so many fig leaves in my closet and on my body. I mean, I've I I didn't sew them, but I can sure put them on. Well, I probably did sew them, sew what you you reap what you sow.
DOT BOWEN:But anyway, so I'm just saying that, yes, it is shame and guilt.
CARA BOWEN:I guess what I'm saying is I don't I don't see Adam like, how the serpent, how Satan wanted to deceive man. He wants to see Adam and Eve. I don't see Adam wanting to deceive God. I think Adam is deceiving himself Wonderful.
DOT BOWEN:Therefore percent.
CARA BOWEN:Therefore, he's deceiving God Yes. In a sense. You know, but it's like his intent and I guess that's like what I was also wanting to point out is, you know, like, Satan's intent was to deceive.
DOT BOWEN:Separate him out of God.
CARA BOWEN:Yeah. And I and I don't think that that was Adam's intent. I think as a result of as a result of the sin, he's deceiving himself. So he's speaking out of it. Like, I think Adam thinks he's telling the truth.
CARA BOWEN:Like, I think Adam I mean, I don't know what he's thinking about. I think he I think to a degree, I think he's like because he's deceived himself, I think he's like, oh, yeah, no. We're we're just are hidden. You know what I mean? Like, I think he's lying to himself is what I'm
DOT BOWEN:just basically saying. He's absolutely lying to himself. And he's wanting to. I I think I I he has no excuse. And he did what he did, and he knew why he wasn't not to do.
DOT BOWEN:And I understand that shame causes us to see things differently. It causes us to shape even what we've done differently. We make excuses for it. We, you know, shame and guilt. There's all of those things.
DOT BOWEN:We lie to ourselves. We lie to God. We lie to other people.
CARA BOWEN:Yeah.
DOT BOWEN:And that's why God was trying to keep us from
CARA BOWEN:Yeah. Doing it. I think I'm pointing it out not to excuse it. I'm just saying he's doing this. We do this.
DOT BOWEN:We do.
CARA BOWEN:You know, to this day. Like, this is like you always say repair. Genesis 3 is still Right. Alive and well. It is.
CARA BOWEN:So, yeah, that's where I'm like, I'm not saying it like it's justifying what Adam's doing. I'm just I'm saying it like we do this. We lie to ourselves. We deceive ourselves when we are, you know, in a situation where we're dealing with even if we haven't done something like, I think we can have shame and we not have necessarily done something. You know, like, maybe we think, you know, we just might not think that we're enough.
CARA BOWEN:And so we feel like, you know, we put shame on ourselves. Do you know
DOT BOWEN:what I'm saying? Well, I'm not gonna go into all of that. But yes, I do know what you're saying. What I wanna say is, yes, shame is a powerful weapon to separate us from God. It is a powerful weapon to create circumstances in our lives that bring more shame.
DOT BOWEN:It it is probably one of Satan's greatest tools to keep us from God. And so, yes, I understand that. I just wanna be careful and make sure that we don't excuse any of our behavior, our Adam and Eve, which I I again, I know you're not. But we have a tendency to say, you know, because I just felt such shame, I just kept doing it. We know that that's what happens.
DOT BOWEN:We know that people that deal with shame, they don't stop doing what they're doing. They they tend to use that shame and run right back into the very thing that they're doing. So we want to to see shame just as it is. It is it is evil. And what you're saying is Adam and Eve were not evil in doing that.
DOT BOWEN:They had this great motivation, but they are evil because now sin has come in. I mean
CARA BOWEN:I'm not saying they have great motivation. I'm just saying that I'm explaining I'm like, this is what they're doing. Like, because we we do this.
DOT BOWEN:We do, and and we don't need to look at Adam. And you're right. I mean, you know, Adam and Eve, you know, we we were come from them. We're like way down the line, but, you know, we've come from Adam and Eve.
CARA BOWEN:Yeah. When I'm pointing I feel like it to point it out in, like, in our relationship with the Lord and in prayer, when he's asking you, like, where are you? Be honest. Be honest. Yeah.
CARA BOWEN:Because it's so easy for shame to convince ourselves of something or, you know, like, it can mask and deceive and, you know, it
DOT BOWEN:it can
CARA BOWEN:cause it's a separation, like you're saying. So I'm just saying, I feel like the like, in our relationship with the Lord, it is so easy to slip if we're not aware, you know, like, we have to, like, keep our eyes open and be like, okay. Am I really being honest? Like, if I'm sitting here with the Lord and he's like, where are you? Like, where's your heart?
CARA BOWEN:What's going on? Like, he knows. You don't have to like, he is very much aware of what happened at this tree. You know, so for Adam to have just been like, that just causes more separation when you when you don't happening thing. No.
CARA BOWEN:And so that's more so what I'm just talking about in our relationship with the Lord. Like, he can handle those the honesty.
DOT BOWEN:Right. So let me speak from experience. And I and I think I've shared this. When I was the feathers away from God, I mean, probably one of the darkest moments in my life when I was mad at god and I just was gonna walk away from everything that I loved and and believed really down deep in my heart, when I was really involved in anger toward god and sin, the greatest freedom that I came, and I've shared this before, is when someone shared with me, call it sin. Just call it sin.
DOT BOWEN:Now no one goes to call it sin. And the reason I'm not I'm just kinda playing with you a little bit because I know you know this. But because there's so many other people in this conversation, shame is sin. It is a result of sin. So we're gonna get to the root of it.
DOT BOWEN:It may be the fruit of sin. It may but what Adam and Eve did was disobey god. And they they scoot around it. They and those that's what we're talking about today about hiding. We're hiding behind we may be hiding behind shame because as we've talked about in people that I know, they've dealt with so much shame is that instead of repenting and turning their lives around and saying, god, I've sinned against you and you only, which is what David said.
DOT BOWEN:They use it as an excuse to continue it and to continue the thing. And so that's hiding, and that's and I just wanted to to clear that up as far as and what I've learned and what god's taught me is, like, every time I start to excuse something that I've done, well, I'm just in a bad mood or they push my button or, you know and and and I remember just it hadn't been that long that I I told god, you know, you better be careful what you tell him, I guess, because he has a way of just going, do you think I believe that? But I remember saying, well, god, I didn't mean that that way, but they pushed my button. And I said, well, then what was in came out?
CARA BOWEN:I think that there's an important distinction in shame and guilt where, like, shame is saying, I am bad. It's like an it's an attack on your identity. And as a child of God, you have been covered by his blood. Like, you are his child. So what you've done doesn't make who you are.
CARA BOWEN:If that was the case, then we wouldn't have access to the throne of grace to begin with because, you know, like, what Jesus did on the cross, like, our identity is in him. So what shame is trying to say to us is who you are is wrong. So you need to hide, you need to step back, like, you are the problem. Because a lot of times, like, what you did was wrong. I mean, it probably was.
CARA BOWEN:If you have shame from it, then yeah, it was that's wrong. And repenting of that and saying like, yes, you know, in Adam's situation, be like, yes, I took him like, we did what you told me. Oh, wait a minute.
DOT BOWEN:Just say that.
CARA BOWEN:Yeah. But also, that does not make him who he is. And I think we do this with good and bad things. I think we take our identity on what we've done. Like, oh, I did really good.
CARA BOWEN:I do good with this thing so that, like, that's who I am. Like, you know, I know like a lot of athletes, that happens with athletes. Like, oh, I'm really good at the sport. And then when they don't have that sport, they like don't know who they are because, you know, they take their identity. And so I think that's such a common thing for humans to do.
CARA BOWEN:And I think that's an important distinction because a lot of times, like, guilt can lead us to repentance. So guilt I don't think guilt is bad as long as guilt doesn't lead you to shame. Like, if Condemnation is not Right. I don't mean I don't yeah. I'm not talking about condemnation either, but saying like, oh, like, I shouldn't have done that.
CARA BOWEN:You know, Adam and Eve, like to feel the weight of sin, to feel like, oh, like that was but to also own your identity, so they know, but I like, yes, that was wrong. You know, should I repented that? You know, like confessing that to the Lord. But then also saying like, but I know that I'm your child. I know that I, you know, I'm covered by your blood.
CARA BOWEN:I know that I'm forgiven. I think that's like important too where it's like, the shame is not like, just to not have shame doesn't mean to say like
DOT BOWEN:like, you're saying, like, acknowledge the sin, but also, like, leave it at the cross and take on your identity as Right. So when Adam and Eve sinned and they sinned against God, because God was the one that made the rules, they were still God's children. That's what you're saying. Right. Is that it?
DOT BOWEN:But the, wages of sin is death. And so God had told him you're gonna die. And so there's that relationship with Adam and Eve, their relationship, their relationship with God, their fellowship with God, they were still God's children, but there was this hiding. There's there's I'm afraid. I I see God differently.
DOT BOWEN:And so sin does that. And and and, it was only until God, you know, sheds the animal skin and covers them. So now, right now, when we're talking to Adam and Eve, they're still in their own, look who I am. Look, you know, this is not my fault because they're still walking and talking to god in fig leaves. So it's only until later does god, you know, kill an animal and say, no.
DOT BOWEN:No. You can't handle you can't you can't deal with your sin.
CARA BOWEN:I do. Yeah. They haven't when they haven't acknowledged it, that it's sin, like you're saying, it's like they're like
DOT BOWEN:And that's the whole point. Yeah. And, you know, and that's where there's this thing. We know that God we know that Jesus loves us. He died for our sins.
DOT BOWEN:And if we confess our sins, he's faithful to forgive us our sins. But we also know that Jesus forgave our sins before we could confess them. So there's this part of feeling, leaving, and and taking away the shame from us by confessing our sin. And that's what I wanna say is that we have to confess our sins. 1st John 19 where it says, if you confess your sins, I'm faithful to forgive them.
DOT BOWEN:Jesus has already forgiven them, but we have to acknowledge there is a forgiveness that happened 2000 years ago. But we have to experience it in our own lives, that forgiveness, and that comes with confession. And so that's where you really when he's saying, you know, we talk about hiding. And sometimes we hide behind the way that we view what we've done. And we see that Adam and Eve, you know, does that.
DOT BOWEN:They, you know, when they finally god was like, what have you done? And he said, well, I was scared because I was naked. And and he he went even naked, and then he was scared because he said he heard the sound of god coming. God's pursuing him, and he got afraid. So he's already not telling god the truth.
DOT BOWEN:But I'm just saying that for us, we're not beaten up on Adam. But for us, if we wanna walk close so the thing that they yes. They were hiding behind their sin. They were hiding behind their excuses. They were hiding behind the relationship they had as a husband and wife.
DOT BOWEN:They were hiding they were hiding in the garden. They were hiding in their world. They were hiding in their ministry. They were hiding in their work. They were hiding in their family.
DOT BOWEN:There we we there's so many hiding places. You know, it's just crazy. But the worst part of it all, for them, was that he had from God. And that's exactly what you were talking about, Kara, is that the enemy's number one reason and motivation. He doesn't care, you know, what we do.
DOT BOWEN:We wanna destroy our lives. He doesn't care. But he does care if we have an intimate personal loving relationship with our father. And that's what he wants that's what he wants to to do. And that's where they're and the biggest point of what I wanna say is they were hiding from God, which we laughed about.
DOT BOWEN:I I still kinda laugh a little bit about it. But, you know, it's like like and I where where do you go and go that you can hide?
CARA BOWEN:Yeah. Right. From the person who knows everything or the guy who knows everything.
DOT BOWEN:Yeah. Yeah. And you're 2 people. And you're now you're walking around with finger leaves. And, you know, so but, again, the issue is that they're hiding from god.
DOT BOWEN:And I can tell you there have been many times that I've hid from God.
CARA BOWEN:Yeah. And I think we can hide from God even from I mean, you've talked about this where you can hide from God in Christian things too. And I was thinking that when you're talking about confession, it's like sometimes, like, the point of confession is to put light on the darkness so that God can heal that, so that you can draw closer to God. But sometimes we can hide behind confession or we could hide behind, you know, doing good works or whatever. And that still doesn't bring you closer to the Lord if your heart is far from him.
CARA BOWEN:You know, like, if it like you're saying, like, the point was, like, God wasn't asking him, you know, where are you? Just for kicks and giggles. It was just Yeah. So that he could, like, let me let me put a light on the darkness that just happened and let me heal this and let me like, let me heal our relationship. Like, let me draw closer to you.
CARA BOWEN:Like, he's wanting to draw closer to us. And so I think that's like important too. Like, we don't have to live in fear. Like, oh my gosh, I gotta like confess every sin that I've ever had, you know, and you don't have to like live in that fear. But I think if there's something where you were, you know, with an Adam's case, it's like very clearly something happened that caused a separation.
CARA BOWEN:So, you know, when sin that you know of to say, like, okay, God, this is how I'm feeling or this is what happened, this is what I did, you know, whatever. And allowing that to draw you closer to God, not just to it's not just to confess for the sake of confessing or it's not just for the, you know, doing it just to do it. But I guess it's the heart.
DOT BOWEN:Yeah. Confession should lead to repentance. Repentance is I'm not just acknowledging what I've done. That's confession. Repentance means I'm not I'm turning from that and I'm turning
CARA BOWEN:from it.
DOT BOWEN:Yeah. I'm really purposely, intentionally asking God to help me with the holy spirit not to do that again. Yeah. I think about Job. You know, we've we've read Job not too long ago.
DOT BOWEN:And, you know, Job would go and confess his, you know, and ask god to, forgive his children's sin. I mean, that doesn't go well. Like, I could they have to do that. Like, you know what I'm saying? It's like, Joe was so scared that their children might sin, which sounds like they did, and that he would ask god to forgive them and stuff.
DOT BOWEN:The reason that confession doesn't really lead to just a lot of freedom, even though I just said we need to confess, you cannot do the confession without the repentance. So I was glad that you said that because it reminded me of how I had what I had said. I kinda left out the other part. I gotta repent. I've gotta choose and and make a decision.
DOT BOWEN:It's like, I don't wanna do that again. Now it doesn't mean I might do it again, but I don't want to.
CARA BOWEN:Well, I think it's yeah. The posture of your heart. It's the posture of your heart is to, like, I am, you know, like, God help me. And also it's like we're human. Like, he knows there's a psalm that says I don't remember where it is.
CARA BOWEN:I feel like it might be 101. But it says, you know that we're made of dust. Like, God is very much aware that we are not What is manual? Yeah. On our own, like, without the help of the Holy Spirit.
CARA BOWEN:So And when you know there's yeah. Yeah. So you can, you know, rest in that. But, yeah, I think the bottom line, it's like it's all comes back to it's not about perfection. It's not about what you're doing.
CARA BOWEN:It's drawing I mean, it is what you do because what you do affects your relationship with the Lord because it affects your heart.
DOT BOWEN:That was your choice.
CARA BOWEN:But it's all about your heart. It's about like, okay, what's going on in your heart and bringing that to the Lord and being honest with him and not just saying what you think he, you know, wants to hear or not just saying, like, half the truth so that you don't have to and sometimes, I mean, it can be hard, but I think that's when you really can experience. I mean, I I know when we talked it was almost a year ago. It was last spring when we talked about, like, my story. And the moment that changed my life forever was when I had the ugliest conversation with the Lord.
CARA BOWEN:Like, I put it all out there. And I basically said, you know, what have you done for me? I don't like you. Like, I don't want anything to do with you. You know, like, it was terrible.
CARA BOWEN:But that's what was in my heart. And I felt the closest because I was telling him that so that we could like, I wasn't just saying that out of, you know, like anger and then closing the door. It's like I put it all out there. And I let him come into that with me. I let him heal those things.
CARA BOWEN:And I think, yeah, keeping the reverence too because, you know, we are talking to a holy God. So it's like, you can tell him, be honest, but also remember he's holy.
DOT BOWEN:Well, and there's just two parts of it. A lot of people wanna be honest and go tell God what they're gonna do. And I had to tell them all. Yeah. Yeah.
DOT BOWEN:I had some people go, when I see God, I'm gonna tell him. And I'm thinking, probably you're probably not. But, you know, that made them feel better. And, yeah, all of this is, you know, we have to humble ourselves. And I think that that's hard for us to humble ourselves.
DOT BOWEN:We do wanna blame other people. And I think when we confess and we repent and when we say, god, you know, like, you know, even being honest and saying, god, I'm mad at you or, you know, like, god, I don't like you right now. You know, don't stay there. Let god step in those places, but that is a be that is a start. If you just go and go tell god what to you know, how mad you are and leave, you're just gonna be madder because last night you're gonna be you're gonna be more miserable.
DOT BOWEN:But I I those are some of the things, you know, that we had about I I think that we do, try to clothe ourselves as far as, like, I can, you know, if I do these 10 things, then I'm gonna really be able to feel better about myself. I'm gonna be able to, you know, feel forgiven. I know who I am. I'm gonna have my identity. I'm gonna have my purpose.
DOT BOWEN:And we're looking for all these kind of things. I wanna know what my gifts are. I wanna know what my talents are. And we're trying so hard. We're just sowing all kinds of, you know, mass production here on fig leaves and why why we're covering up.
DOT BOWEN:And I think that that the key to to Genesis theory and what they were hiding from, yes, they were hiding from themselves, and that's where honesty helps. But they're really hiding from God. So the issue is that they're running from God. So a lot of people wanna talk about, well, I'm just running for myself or I'm running. I don't know who I am.
DOT BOWEN:And all of those things are good. We just kinda stop sometimes with one part of it. And Yeah. We're just saying, oh, we're running. And then Or I'm hiding.
DOT BOWEN:I'm not gonna hide anymore. I'm gonna find you know, I wanna be who I am. I wanna find out who I am. And I'm yeah. And all that kind of stuff.
DOT BOWEN:But that's just one part of it. If you're in a relationship with god, you may wanna not hide from him. You may wanna find out who he is. So I I think that with Adam and Eve, and one of the things that really speaks to my heart with this is that the whole issue here, yes, it is sin separates me from God, my intimacy with God, my love for God, the way that I see him and and stuff. And that's way more important to deal with because I think, you know, when we abide in him, then we produce spiritual fruit.
DOT BOWEN:We we deal god is able to deal with those things, but the key here is that we're hiding from God. We all know
CARA BOWEN:we're not hiding. Hide from God. Yeah.
DOT BOWEN:Yeah. No. But the problem is we're hiding from God. And and, yeah. And most people, Kara, when they deal with what they're hiding behind, they're usually trying to find out what's going on in their heart so that they'll be better.
DOT BOWEN:And you will be better and you'll feel better, but it will be because you have restored and humbled yourself before God and you restored your relationship with God. Well, I
CARA BOWEN:think it's I I keep going back to, like, it's just a heart. It's a heart thing because it's like, I think finding, like, oh, what are you good at or what, like, stuff about how you're wired or, like, those kind of things or whatever maybe. Like, I think all those things can be like, those aren't bad things. But I think you can take good things, and if you're using it and I think that's goes back to just being honest with yourself of using that to hide from God or to push God away. You know, like, I mean, look at the Pharisees.
CARA BOWEN:He said, you're you are doing all the right things, but your hearts are far from me. And I think that's You
DOT BOWEN:are washed. Uh-huh.
CARA BOWEN:Yeah. And I think that's like, because I think it's good to look at what we're doing, but I think also it's more important to know like, okay, why the why behind it, and where's your heart?
DOT BOWEN:And Yeah. That would be where are you, I think too, don't you?
CARA BOWEN:Right. Yeah. I think the whole abiding in Christ is something that we say a lot. But can you, like, practically speaking, what does that look like to abide in Christ? Because I think that's one of those words that we use a lot in I'm sure.
CARA BOWEN:Yeah. Language. And it's like, okay, that's great. But I don't really Yeah. Like, I know what abide means, but, like, what does that look like practically speaking?
DOT BOWEN:Well, ironically, this kinda does go along with, Genesis 3 because when we're abiding in Christ, it's not works oriented. You don't you know, if you go in there and you go see an apple on a tree, the apple on the tree is hanging from the, you know, the branch. It's not sitting there working itself, trying to hold on, like, you know, do everything they can to hold on.
CARA BOWEN:Not striving to No.
DOT BOWEN:Yeah. Not striving to do that. It's just there. And it's allowing the branch and this the the root of the tree, the, you know, all of the branches, everything. They're all the nutrients, everything is just going through their body.
DOT BOWEN:And the body is allowing the holy spirit to flow in our body so that we don't have to struggle. We don't have to fret. We don't have to worry about things. We're just trusting God. And so by abiding in Christ means I'm trusting him.
DOT BOWEN:I'm not trying to
CARA BOWEN:And you're resting in him.
DOT BOWEN:Right. I'm resting in him. I'm not trying to make myself better. I know that I am a child of God because of Jesus. I don't have to, manipulate God.
DOT BOWEN:I know I can trust him. I don't have to get the approval of others because I've got the approval of Jesus. So I'm not sitting there striving to be somebody, to be a fruit. I'm not sitting there trying to be an apple. I'm just gonna be a good apple.
DOT BOWEN:I'm just gonna be a good apple. The apple on the vine, if you just use that, it's just abiding and enjoying all of the nutrients that the the branch is giving, the tree's giving, and those things. And so when Jesus said, if you're abiding me in my word, abide in you. And and and that's where that's one of the things is that god's word, god's truth, those, you know, getting away from the lies, The lies cause us to stress out. The lies cause us trying very hard to abide, to do the right thing, to make sure God's pleased with us, to feel like you can't, you know, you're always disappointing God.
DOT BOWEN:And that's that's not entering into god's rest. And so abiding is part of recognising the lies that I'm telling myself, whether it's with lies about who I am, lies about the people that I know, lies about, you know, what I think about everything. And so when I think it's, like, not
CARA BOWEN:it's not only acknowledging kinda what we're saying is, like, not stopping there where it's acknowledging the lies, but then also replacing it with the truth and then accepting it. It's saying
DOT BOWEN:Live in a mouth.
CARA BOWEN:Yeah. Or just like accepting that it's true. And sometimes I think that can take time. It may just be, you know, like asking God to help you or like just telling yourself over and over, like saying like, I'm a child of God. I'm a child of God.
CARA BOWEN:Or, you know, like, I think it's like accepting it because sometimes we can I think there's a difference in just, like, telling ourselves something, but then also, like, accepting it? You know, like, kinda like even the same thing with lies, like we mentioned last week, like, we can't a lie might come into our head, but we don't have to accept it. And so I think the same applies with truth too, where it's like we might hear truth, but we may not accept it. And so and then also you can be in being honest with God and being like, that's hard for me to accept. Like, why is it hard for me to accept your love?
CARA BOWEN:Or why is it hard for me to, you know, and like so anyway, yeah, like it all comes back to you. But, yeah, I think that's helpful. It's like abiding in Christ is ultimately just it's just resting in him, like trusting him, like letting him be enough.
DOT BOWEN:You know, and Jesus said, I am the word. And and then if you read in Revelation, it says, he is the word. And so, you know, when he comes back as king, he is named the word of God. So we wanna just trust that God is, you know, trust him and trust his holy spirit, you know, running, you know, through our every being. And and that's just asking god to fill you with that holy spirit, and he's given you.
DOT BOWEN:But you've gotta you can't damn the damn it up. You can't put stuff in there and the lies. You know, everybody's like, girl, I don't even feel like I have the holy spirit. And they're like, what does that mean about being filled by the holy spirit? And I'm not gonna go into that, but he's just gonna say this.
DOT BOWEN:And that is there when sin enters our life, it's like if you have a a river, which remember Jesus told the woman at the well, if you ask if you know who I am, you'll ask me and I'll give you, you know, living water and it streams it streams and goes through you. What that living water is and that streams that goes through us is the holy spirit. And why what we wanna do when people say, well, I wanna be filled with the holy spirit. What that is is that every part of my life is under the control of of Jesus that I know of as much as that I'm aware of. And there's nothing that's stopping damming up that spirit flowing through me.
DOT BOWEN:So so those are the kind of things. It's when you acknowledge you you've sinned against God by believing the lies. I don't care where they came from. You know, Adam said, well, the woman that you gave me, you know, gave me the fruit. But, okay, Adam, Why didn't you throw it down?
DOT BOWEN:Why didn't you eat it? So it was did she stuff it down your throat? You know? So it was Adam that was, like, not taking responsibility. It's someone else's fault that I'm like this.
DOT BOWEN:It's my mom's fault. I'm sure you've never said that. But, you know, it's just one of those things. It's just one of those things. Those kind of things stops the holy spirit from flowing through us.
DOT BOWEN:Yeah.
CARA BOWEN:It does.
DOT BOWEN:Well, it's I mean, if
CARA BOWEN:you think about what the enemy does, I mean, he lies and he accuse he's the accuser of the breadland, like, you know, we've said. And so it's when we start throwing blame and accusations.
DOT BOWEN:It's not yeah.
CARA BOWEN:It's not bad. And I think, you know, again, there's no shame in that. If you find yourself doing that, then, you know, repent and be like, okay, what do I need to own? What you know, like, God help me, you know, to see, you know, whatever it is that you may need to see. But
DOT BOWEN:So I don't wanna throw a wrench in here, but I got to say this. I think that shame can be used as a weapon against us. I think it can destroy our lives. I've seen so many people be destroyed because they are operating and making choices because of the shame. Yeah.
DOT BOWEN:But I also think shame can be a good thing. I think that shame has a good side of it in the fact that we realize we are not anything. We cannot be anything. We could never be holy enough. We're never good enough.
DOT BOWEN:That's why we need a saviour. That's why we need Jesus. And I think feeling and repenting over our sin and crying out over our sin, I think when David wept over his sin with Bathsheba, somebody, like, could come up to him and go, no, David. You you know, God loves you, and you've been a great king. And, yeah, I mean, you know, she was bathing for the love.
DOT BOWEN:She shouldn't have been out on the roof. Well, David, you should've been in battle. But, anyway, that's beside the point, David. You know? And and the thing I just wanna bring out is because we live in a world right now that I think sin is rapid, no one wants to acknowledge it.
DOT BOWEN:They don't even wanna talk about it because it makes everybody feel bad even though Romans, you know, that's all Romans talks about is the wrath of God and the sin. But I just wanna bring out that if you're feeling ashamed of what you've done, you should go to God. That's like that's God's way maybe of getting you to to say, I've sinned against you, god. Now that's I mean, Genesis 3 should've just been short. God went up to him and said, you know, what have you done?
DOT BOWEN:He said, I've sinned against you. You know, but they didn't. They did all kinds of stuff. But that's all I'm I just wanna just throw that out.
CARA BOWEN:I think shame with humility, I think, you know and I think that I think there's difference between And don't make it your identity is what you were saying earlier. Yeah. It's like and I think if shame like, bringing again that if it's bringing you closer to the Lord, I think a lot of like the toxic shame is what separates us, or you know, it's called what can separate us. But I do think that, yeah, I agree. I think that there is a healthy shame that can lead us closer to Jesus.
CARA BOWEN:And I think that it's paired with humility to say like, oh, like, I'm not enough. Like, we're not. Yeah. In and of ourselves. But because of Jesus, like, Jesus makes us enough.
CARA BOWEN:That's right.
DOT BOWEN:You know? And I I think that, you know, as we begin to get into, you know and and next week's really a fun thing because Jesus come you know, he came. He, you know, he he went He's in Genesis 3? Yeah. Jesus is.
DOT BOWEN:He is. He's in, yeah, he's the seed of the woman that, God promises. We don't spoil it. We're okay. Okay.
DOT BOWEN:Okay. I'm sorry. Sorry. But I'm just saying that what we wanna know is that god went there. Like, just don't wanna miss that.
DOT BOWEN:God loving us so much that he went looking for Adam and Eve. He like, okay. I'm gonna, you know I know you're gonna lie to me, so I'm gonna give you some questions to get have you to understand because you you're believing all these lies. Well, I think
CARA BOWEN:the pursuit, it shows the pursuit of So much. Of God. Yes. Where it's like he knew that he Adam and Eve, you know, massively sinned against like, he they They're done. I mean, yeah, the worst of all sins because I mean, the first sin.
CARA BOWEN:You know, it's like they're the ones that brought it all here. Thanks, guys. Yeah. But I but, yeah, it's like even in that, god still goes after them and is wanting to draw them close. And it's the same thing, yeah, with us where he's just always coming after us.
DOT BOWEN:Yeah. You know, Carrie, I think God just is like, don't be so prideful. Don't be so shocked what you might do. If you're not trusting God and you're not really dependent upon God and you're not asking God to empower you through the Holy Spirit, don't be shocked at what you can do. Because without, you know, without God, we're nothing.
DOT BOWEN:Without Jesus, we're nothing. And and he, you know, he's the one that gives us the strength. He's the one, you know, that empowers us. He's the one that opens our eyes to the truth, all of those things. And and I think, you know, it's just really hard because it's that was part of the sin.
DOT BOWEN:That was what got the temptation is Adam and Eve wanted to be god. And a lot of times, I think when people say, well, I just don't think that God could love me, or I don't think that I'm lovable, or you just don't know what I've done. You just do not know what I've done. If you knew what I was done, you know, you would you would hate me, and I know God does. And I just think that when you look at Genesis 3, it was God that started the conversation.
DOT BOWEN:It was God that initiated the the relationship. And I think that whatever you've done I mean, Paul, you know, Paul I mean, you read the 2 testament. He says, I'm the chief. Look what he did. And yet, god saved him, and god loved him, and god pursued him.
DOT BOWEN:And so it's not that, you know, the things that we're hiding, we don't we could stay on this. And in this conversation till Jesus comes back, if we wanted to name some of the things that we hide behind and never get to all of those things. But the thing is, who am I hiding from? And and, yes, I may be hiding from myself because I don't like myself. But I'm really hiding, but and running from God's pursuit and his love for me.
DOT BOWEN:That's where I think is the most powerful thing about this hiding. Now, you know, later on, Jesus will say, you know, you are in Christ and Christ is in me and that we're supposed to, he is our life and we are hidden in Christ. So it's not that that we're hiding is as bad. It's it's where we're hiding and who are we running from. And that's the key.
DOT BOWEN:Those are the things I think those three questions begins to shed light on the things that are keeping us from an intimate and a very loving, relationship with our savior.
CARA BOWEN:Thanks for listening. I'm so glad that you could be a part of our conversation. To continue the conversation, you can find Dodd on social media at dotboehen or visit her website dotboehen.com. Subscribe, like, and share with your friends, and we will see you next week on Write This Down with Dot
DOT BOWEN:Bowen.
